Monisha Vemavarapu and Neha Swain
Youth workers, Facilitators, Founders - Rubaroo, Hyderabad
Keeping the Faith in the Young and the Restless
“I spent 17 years of my life in Hyderabad then I moved to Delhi to study fashion and design. After college I was part of an exchange programme that took me to London and then a village in Rajasthan for 3 months each. This experience shattered a lot of notions around identities of caste, religion, language and how they play out. I am glad I got a space to look at these social structures as it helped me widen my worldview. Later, when I started working as a development consultant, it helped me facilitate other young people's journeys. That's where I met Neha, and we started working together with adolescents. We both moved to Hyderabad and started Rubaroo- a safe space for young people to be able to question habits and patterns handed down unconsciously. Our vision at Rubaroo was to facilitate inclusion, love and friendship amongst the youth. Our work lies at the intersection of gender, interfaith dialogue and youth development. I grew up conflicted, rejecting my own identity as a Telugu, as there was much hatred towards Muslims and/or other castes in my family. I found no space or acceptance for my relationships with people different from us. I wanted to address the conflicts around religion. And that's why I wanted to use the power of dialogue in Rubaroo, to address conflicts instead of brushing them under the carpet.”
- Monisha
“ Active citizenship and volunteering was always part of my life and relationships. At home, we were brought up on the values of inclusion. Lots of those dots connected eventually when I met Monisha and we started working with young people. We realised that there was no organisation in Hyderabad working with the youth, no space for dialog around faith, gender, and sexuality. We got support from the British Deputy High Commision to do a project on the Muslim youth and how they felt about Islam and Islamophobia which led to many interesting discoveries and realizations around faith and religion. We realised that we really need more such conversations and that gave birth to ‘Agaaz-e-Baatcheet’ (Beginning of conversations) - a call to 'initiate a dialogue', at Rubaroo.
- Neha
Both Monisha and Neha feel that one doesn’t necessarily need to be steeped in religiosity but an understanding of one’s own religious identity is helpful to facilitate interfaith conversations in both personal and professional spaces.
Neha explains, “You need to have basic knowledge about religion, scriptures and rituals along with an open and unbiased mind when you are offering a safe space for conversations. Our programmes are all designed to challenge norms, stereotypes and social patterns. And if we want to challenge something, we first need to understand it completely . Even to have a conversation with my own family, it's important to know the differences between cultural practices and religious texts. It's often the different interpretations of the text that creates conflict and fissures in our relationships. And we need to learn how to navigate through these differences. For e.g. I am married to a Christian and even though I haven’t converted or changed my surname, I go to the church with my husband sometimes. Similarly, I go to the temple with my father when I am free, along with my husband. I do this because both these relationships are important to me. Everyone in my family eats non vegetarian, except my father who eats on very few days of the week, but he has made peace with everyone’s food choices.
Monisha adds, “ I come from a family where both sides always had rules of what is to be eaten, not eaten; and limitations in wanting to connect with someone outside the boundaries that come with such strong beliefs. I have to constantly remind myself to not take on their burden. I have my own culture, community, and a different lifestyle which is more political, and challenging of existing norms.”
“At work, our approach is value based that focuses on acknowledging and recognising an individual’s values, which further influence attitudes and behaviours, and values cannot be turned on or off. It’s important to understand that it’s not ‘Us vs Them’. All religions talk about peace. It’s often our personal interpretations that cause clashes.”
When the anti CAA-NRC movement happened, Neha and Monisha opened the doors of their office to everyone.
Neha shares, “Political, apolitical, students from the left and the right side of the political spectrum...all were welcome! We wanted everyone to feel safe at Rubaroo. We wanted people to decode their biases. Why did they choose the side they were on? Were these biases imposed by their families? Ingrained and deep rooted through a cultural handing down of values and practices? Would they choose differently if they grew up with different sets of values? If they got more exposure? We wanted our space to be open and safe for such conversations. We wanted people to listen to each other’s stories, deeply with empathy and curiosity. Because that’s how people heal... when they talk to each other, listen to each other, question their doubts, address their fears and share their lived experiences. In mental wellbeing - there are so many multiple tabs open in your own head that you can't process, and so you shut it out and disappear. How I’m able to take care of my own mental health during this time with all these events is important, because there is also a lot of hopelessness that's coming out. And this turmoil around elections, riots, events also exploits and brings out these emotions in me. Why is the voter in me, made to feel a certain way ? We have a lot of one-on one conversations with young people.”
During the pandemic, when the Tableeghi Jamaat incident happened, it almost triggered communal violence. With all their youth volunteers, Neha and Monisha hosted an online (week long) campaign to address fake news and promote communal harmony. They had a group that was dispelling fake news and misconceptions on Muslims spreading Corona.
Monisha shares, “For us young people matter, no matter what their ideologies are. We want to focus on our relationships with them. Our false assumptions about a particular community often make us behave irrationally. Judgements lead to conflicts. We learn newer perspectives when we interact with diverse communities and that's what we want to keep doing.“
Neha says, “ There are so many stories of young people becoming comfortable with their religious identity. We worked with a lot of youth in Hyderabad . Earlier they would be comfortable interacting only in their own ‘known community’, but slowly they opened up to people of other religious groups. Our programme gave them an opportunity to be in a space other than home or college or school. We have seen a lot of interfaith friendships and love stories emerge through these interactions. Girls go back more confident, realizing that no one is judging them in their hijabs and burqas. A huge difference is when they come out and lead action, taking permission from their parents.”
Neha believes that every government benefits from dividing people on the basis of caste and religion and our country still doesn't let young people take charge. Monisha reiterates that one must work with the youth, who can then work with their peers, their communities and families to change mindsets. They end with the example of Ayesha, a young teacher who did an activity in her school where she asked all the students to empty their water bottles into a bucket. She then exclaimed, “Look you have filled the whole bucket together! Can you tell me which drop came from which bottle?
They both believe that ultimately it’s the youth who will ultimately turn the tide of hate!
Interviewed by Nida Ansari and Pooja Dhingra
Collage by Shreya Roy Chowdhury and Pooja Dhingra